Healing the Anxious Inner Child

Our early childhood experiences shape who we become as adults. Some memories connect us to love, joy, and comfort. While other memories may be difficult to revisit and bring distress, pain, and unresolved emotions.

You may have heard the term “trigger” more frequently these days. Emotional triggers are reactions sparked by sensory input, like a sound, smell, memory, or situation, that elicits a strong, sometimes overwhelming response. Often, the emotional reaction seems bigger than the actual event. These moments can be invitations to slow down and ask, where this feeling really coming from? Sometimes a feeling is just a feeling and there’s not much to investigate. But at other times, a strong emotional response may be rooted in a deeper, earlier experience. This may be your cue to connect with your inner child. 

The Anxious Inner Child

Children who experience anxiety may struggle with overthinking, low self-esteem, and perfectionism. Symptoms may present as stomach aches, difficulty concentrating, poor sleep, and irritability. A lack of emotional or physical safety, due to unmet basic needs, instability, or emotional neglect, can contribute to childhood anxiety. On the other hand, when a child feels secure and loved, they have the freedom to explore, make mistakes, and grow. This foundation of safety helps a child build confidence and resilience.

If you were an anxious kid, fears and worries about the past and future may make it difficult to be present. Anxiety questions if you can trust that things will be okay. While anxiety can be viewed negatively, anxiety’s function is to protect you and give you clues that something might not be right. It’s important to listen without judgment and to support yourself through the discomfort. This compassionate curiosity helps bring you to a more grounded place, where you can respond instead of react.

What is the Inner Child?

The "inner child" is a psychological concept that refers to the unconscious part of ourselves shaped by early childhood experiences, emotions, and memories. While psychoanalyst Carl Jung introduced the idea of the "divine child" as an archetype within the human psyche, the term inner child was later popularized by authors like John Bradshaw, in his book Homecoming: Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child. This inner part of us can influence how we react emotionally, form beliefs, and cope with challenges. For example, unresolved feelings of shame or abandonment from childhood may continue to affect adult relationships and self-perception. However, connecting with the inner child can also help us rediscover joy, creativity, and a sense of wonder. Through this connection, we begin to offer ourselves the care and validation we may have missed.

Ways to Support Your Inner Child

Safety – As an adult, it’s important to create emotional and physical safety for yourself. This can begin with setting boundaries, defining what is and isn’t acceptable in your life. This is part of the re-parenting process, to recognize unmet needs from childhood and learn how to fulfill them now.

Consistency – Structure and routine can provide a sense of stability. Routines don’t have to be set in stone, but they are most effective when consistent, realistic, and flexible. This supports predictability and gaining self-trust. When life gets chaotic, having a reliable rhythm can be grounding.

Self-Compassion – Pay attention to your inner dialogue. If you’re harsh or critical towards a mistake or your emotions, it might be time to shift how you are talking to yourself. Try responding to yourself how you would a child or a close friend. Affirmations don’t have to be overly positive or forced, they just have to be kind and true. For example:

-       “It’s okay to feel this way.”

-       “It’s normal to feel frustrated by a mistake and I’m proud of myself for trying.”

Visualization – Use your imagination to reconnect with peaceful or joyful moments. This could be a memory from childhood or a calming place, real or imagined. Whether it’s the beach, a cozy library, your bedroom or a scenic trail, let your mind bring you somewhere that feels comforting.

Creativity – Creativity is a powerful way of self-expression. Being creative and an artist can come in many different forms, try journaling, dancing, cooking, drawing, or anything that lets you express yourself freely. This taps into the playful and spontaneous part of your inner child. What would you create if you weren’t worried about the outcome?

Joy – Joy lives in small, everyday moments. Life can feel boring and mundane if you wait for big milestones to allow for happiness. Find what genuinely lifts your mood, whether it’s a movie night, running errands with a friend, lying on the floor listening to your favorite music, baking brownies, or simply adding honey to your coffee. Be curious and intentional about adding more of these moments into your life.

Please note, this work can be a process and the offerings above can be a great starting place. If you have a trauma history and find yourself needing more support, please pause before revisiting traumatic events by yourself. You may benefit from therapy with a focus on childhood trauma and the support of a professional.

If this blog resonated with you, consider joining our upcoming in-person workshop, “Healing the Anxious Inner Child.” 

Together, we’ll explore inner child work through creative expression and shared joy. We hope to see you there!

Click Here to Sign Up

Where?

SoHa Arts Building

1001 White Horse Pike

Haddon Twp, NJ 08107

When?

June 12th 2025, 6PM – 730PM

Interested in learning more about Creatively You Therapy and how Art Therapy can help you? Contact us today!

Contact Us Here!